Book Review: Braineater Jones by Stephen Kozeniewski



Braineater Jones wakes up face down in a swimming pool with no memory of his former life, how he died, or why he’s now a zombie. With a smart-aleck severed head as a partner, Jones descends into the undead ghetto to solve his own murder.

But Jones’s investigation is complicated by his crippling addiction to human flesh. Like all walking corpses, he discovers that only a stiff drink can soothe his cravings. Unfortunately, finding liquor during Prohibition is costly and dangerous. From his Mason jar, the cantankerous Old Man rules the only speakeasy in the city that caters to the postmortem crowd.

As the booze, blood, and clues coagulate, Jones gets closer to discovering the identity of his killer and the secrets behind the city’s stranglehold on liquid spirits. Death couldn’t stop him, but if the liquor dries up, the entire city will be plunged into an orgy of cannibalism.

Cracking this case is a tall order. Braineater Jones won’t get out alive, but if he plays his cards right, he might manage to salvage the last scraps of his humanity.


My Review

I received a free copy of the audiobook for an honest review.

Not only is Braineater Jones a different take on the whole zombie genre, but it is hilarious at times! One of my favorite quotes: “Damn near ruptured my spleen, I noticed later upon takin’ it out and checkin’ it.”

Braineater Jones (not his real name) wakes up face down in a swimming pool and realizes that he’s not breathing, but he’s still alive. Well, not alive but aware. He has no heartbeat and he doesn’t have to breathe so, technically, he’s dead. He has no memory of who he is or how he got here. He soon finds out that there’s an entire community of undead but his primary goal is to find out who killed him. And to not get killed again, what he calls double dog dead.

I’m glad I received the audio version of this book. The narrator, Steve Rimpici, does a fantastic job of using the right voice for Jones. He definitely sounds like someone in the noir genre during the 30’s.

Braineater Jones is a fun read. It’s unique, witty, and funny. It is gross at times (I mean, zombies are in it) but even then it’s usually funny. I definitely recommend Braineater Jones even if you’re tired of zombies.

Available on Amazon.


About the Author

7183355Stephen Kozeniewski (pronounced: “causin’ ooze key”) lives with his wife and two cats in Pennsylvania, the birthplace of the modern zombie. He was born to the soothing strains of “Boogie With Stu” even though The Who are far superior to Zep, for reasons that he doesn’t even really want to get into right now.

During his time as a Field Artillery officer, he served for three years in Oklahoma and one in Iraq, where due to what he assumes was a clerical error, he was awarded the Bronze Star. The depiction of addiction in his fiction is strongly informed by the three years he spent working at a substance abuse clinic, an experience which also ensures that he employs strict moderation when enjoying the occasional highball of Old Crow. 
He is also a classically trained linguist, which sounds much more impressive than saying his bachelor’s degree is in German.